Not Meant To Be Broken Read online

  I took another hesitant step closer and Zach’s eyes opened, his gaze meeting mine. “Shit, Amber!” He jerked upright, hitting his head against the shower and dropped his erection. I drew my eyes back up to his face. Shock was plain on Zach’s face. He didn’t try to cover himself up. “What are you doing here?”

  My cheeks were flushed and I fumbled for an answer. “I was curious.”

  Zach relaxed slightly and something shifted on his face. “Curious?”

  “I wanted to watch you.”

  Zach twitched in response. He groaned, then shook his head. “I think I hit my head too hard, because I could swear you just said you want to watch me jerking off.”

  I walked closer until I was directly in front of the glass stall. Nerves twisted my stomach so tightly, I was worried I’d throw up. Calm down, Amber. This was your idea. Now go through with it. It was stupid that a completely naked Zach made me anxious. Zach was watching me intently. “Amber? I need you to be very clear about what you want,” his voice was a hoarse plea. What did I want? My eyes traveled the length of his body. I wanted to run my hands over his skin. “Can I watch you touch yourself?”

  Zach stared, then he snapped out of it. He wrapped his palm around his length. “You mean like that?”

  I nodded, then opened the stall. Water sprayed my face. I didn’t care. I stepped inside with my pajama pants and top still on. I needed that barrier, even though it wasn’t really a protection from anything. “Amber?” Zach asked. He leaned back against the tiled wall. The water was soaking my clothes, plastering the fabric against my skin. The pajama pants and the top were both white, so they probably didn’t leave much to the imagination. I should take them off. It would be so easy, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. Cold air flooded the stall and I closed the door. Zach stood across from me, only an arm-length away, his hand curled around his length. “Do you want me to move?” He slid his hand up and down, then stopped.

  I nodded, biting my lip. He began stroking himself again, eyes burning into me with a hunger that made heat gather in the pit of my stomach. I pressed my legs together and tried to tense the muscles of my core to alleviate some of the tension. It was almost painful. I needed some relief, but I didn’t know what to do. I couldn’t touch myself, not like this. Why not? In bed with Zach’s arm around me, it hadn’t felt strange. And he was touching himself too. Zach was panting, his strokes becoming faster, his knuckles turning white from the iron grip on his length. I wondered how it would be if I was the one doing that to him. I could feel myself getting wet between my legs. He let out a long groan, hand curling around the tip of his length as he came. I sucked in a deep breath, waiting for a flicker of fear but there was none. Only fascination and want. I wanted to touch Zach. I wanted him to touch me. He would make me feel good. I knew it. Zach stared at me, still clutching himself as the water washed away the signs of his orgasm. He looked as if he was expecting me to freak out any moment. It was almost comical. I burst out laughing. It felt as if I’d taken down another of my walls and it felt incredible. Relief washed over Zach’s face and he chuckled. “That was…”

  “Weird?”

  He shook his head. “Hot. At least for me.”

  Suddenly, I felt daring. Maybe it was because Zach’s penis was softening and he wasn’t posing an immediate threat, which was a stupid thing to think but my brain was messed up so its logic wasn’t exactly reasonable. “I want to get out of my clothes,” I whispered.

  Zach stopped washing himself. “Okay?”

  I couldn’t look him in the eyes when I said, “No touching.” God, could I sound any more pathetic? Why was Zach putting up with me?

  “No touching,” Zach said quietly. He put his hands behind his back, trapping them between the wall and his butt.

  I gripped the hem of my top, then paused.

  “Amber, you don’t have to do anything you’re not comfortable with. But I swear to you I won’t ever touch you if you don’t ask me to.”

  “I know,” I said. “But what if you don’t like what you see?”

  “Your clothes aren’t hiding all that much and I saw almost all of you yesterday. And believe me, you are fucking beautiful.”

  My fingers on the hem tightened and I quickly pulled it over my head, my arms dropping to my side. The top landed in a wet heap on the ground and was quickly joined by my pajama pants as I slide them down my legs. Then I hooked my fingers under my panties and pulled them down as well. I had to force myself to stand still and not cover myself. Zach’s eyes roamed my body, then they settled on my face. I tried not to notice that he was getting hard again. He was turned on by me, by my body. The knowledge excited and frightened me at the same time. The warm water rained down on us as our eyes locked. I was in control, I reminded myself again. I took a step closer to Zach who still leaned motionless against the wall. His eyes followed my movements as I reached out and lay my palms flat against his naked chest. He was almost completely hard again and if I moved closer he’d brush against my stomach. For a moment I was overwhelmed by the situation, by the realization that I was naked in a shower with a man. Not any man; this was Zach. I trusted him more than I thought I could ever trust a man again. I inched my hands lower, coming to rest on his lower abdomen. For a moment, I considered wrapping my hand around his length but then I lost courage. The pressure between my legs hadn’t lessened and I shifted again. Realization crossed Zach’s face. “What do you want, honey?”

  It was the first time he’d used that term and it made me feel warm in an entirely different way. “I don’t know,” I admitted. I almost wished Zach would take lead and touch me. He didn’t.

  “Did it turn you on to watch me come?”

  “Yes.” The word was a breathless whisper.

  Zach brought his face closer without moving his body. He gently kissed my lips. “Do you want to come too?” he asked in a husky voice and my face exploded with embarrassment. Zach could be direct about these matters without ever blushing. I guessed it came with experience. I gave the tiniest nod.

  Zach shook his head. “That’s not enough,” he said quietly. “I need you to tell me or I won’t move.”

  I searched his eyes but his gaze was relentless. He wouldn’t touch me without my spoken agreement. “Yes, I want to come,” I finally got out. “I want you to touch me this time.”

  Zach’s chest heaved. “Let’s go back to my room, okay?”

  “Okay.” Zach turned off the shower and stepped out, handing me a towel before he took one for himself and began drying himself. I had to bite back a smile when I watched him rub his length. How would he hide it on our way to his room? He wrapped a towel around his hips but that didn’t really hide anything. When I’d covered myself with my towel, I followed Zach back to our room.

  I felt nervous but the tension between my legs spoke louder than my worry. I stood uncertainly in the room and Zach put his hand on my shoulders. “Tell me if you changed your mind.”

  I shook my head. I walked over to the bed and sank down on it, towel still around me. Zach crouched in front of me. He cupped my face in his hands. “I want to make you feel good.” He leaned forward, then whispered against my mouth. “Let me lick you. I want to kiss every inch of your body.”

  My lips parted in surprise. The thought of Zach’s mouth between my legs sent a thrill through me. That wasn’t something that could remind me of what happened. I loved when Zach kissed me, how much better would it feel if he kissed me down there. “Okay,” I said.

  “Scoot up,” Zach rasped. I did and watched him wide-eyed as he settled on the bed beside me. He hooked one finger under my towel, then looked at me. “Can I take it off?”

  I nodded, then remembered Zach’s rule and said, “Yes.”

  Zach opened my towel and I lifted my butt and back from the bed so he could slide it out from below me. “I’m going to tell you before I kiss or touch you somewhere, and you say ‘yes’. If you don’t I’ll stop, okay?”

  “Okay.”

&
nbsp; “Okay,” Zach breathed, eyes intense as they roamed over my naked body.

  Zach

  My eyes took in every inch of Amber’s beautiful body. I couldn’t believe she’d watched me jerking off. The memory of the look on her face when I’d stroked myself alone was enough to make me hard again.

  But my boner didn’t matter right now. As Amber lay before me, naked, with trust in her eyes all I cared about was to show her what pleasure meant. I wanted to prove to her that yesterday had been nothing. I leaned over her breasts, then looked up into her eyes. She closed them quickly, her cheeks turning red. “I’m going to kiss and lick your breasts now,” I murmured, my lips an inch from her nipple. I had done it yesterday, but I could tell that Amber was more nervous today because she was naked and vulnerable. And with only a towel around my hips I wasn’t exactly dressed either.

  “Okay,” she said in the barest whisper, her muscles taut. I darted my tongue over her nipple and she jerked. I cupped my lips around her hardened nub, circled it with my tongue, first slow then faster. Her lips parted, eyes squeezed shut, but she didn’t make a sound. I’d lick her and kiss her and suck her until I got another moan from her. I loved her taste, the feel of her warm skin against my lips, the pressure of her hard nipple against my tongue. I pulled back a few inches and blew on her wet skin. Her skin rippled with goose bumps and I allowed myself a few seconds to admire her breasts and pink nipples, then I took one nub back into my mouth and sucked very lightly, then harder. Amber squirmed, her lips pressed together. I wanted to get her slick with arousal before I tasted her. I darted my eyes down to her pussy. She was clamping her thighs together. I knew I’d find her already wet if I slipped my hand between her legs. My cock twitched in response. Fuck. I wanted to touch every inch of her. I let her nipple glide out of my mouth slowly and trailed my tongue around her breast, then sucked at the skin over her ribs. Amber let out a small laugh. “That tickles.”

  I grinned and dusted my fingertips over her ribs teasingly. She buckled, giggling. “Zach!” I moved my mouth a few inches lower and kissed her waist, her hipbone, the soft skin of her belly. She became still under my ministrations and I risked a glance up. She was biting her lip as she watched me, then she looked away. “I want to kiss you between your legs.” I want to eat your pussy would probably have been a bit too direct for Amber.

  “Okay,” she murmured. “But no fingers,” she added in obvious embarrassment. I paused my kissing and licking of her hipbone and searched her face. “You mean no touching, or you don’t want me to put a finger in you?”

  Her blush had spread over her breasts by now, but I needed for her to say what she wanted. With other women I’d always known what to do, and they’d mostly been quite vocal about their wants anyway, but with Amber I wouldn’t take the risk of pushing past her comfort zone. She buried her face in her palms. “God, this is so embarrassing.” She took a deep breath. “The second.” The thought of why she was so scared of having anything pushed into her turned my stomach and I could feel my dick softening.

  “I won’t put my finger in you, I promise, but I really want to touch you, okay?” I also really wanted to slip a finger into her core to show her that it could feel really good, but I wouldn’t do it, not before she asked me to.

  She lowered her hands and met my eyes briefly before settling back against the pillow. “Okay.”

  I brought one hand up to her hipbone, then slid it over her stomach down to the edge of her soft brown hairs. She tensed and I paused with my fingers, just brushing her mount. When she relaxed I cupped her with my palm. She was so fucking hot and wet. My middle finger rested against her clit and I pressed lightly. A small noise escaped Amber. I slowly pushed her legs apart, revealing her glistening pink folds. I groaned and pressed another kiss against her hipbone. God, I wanted to lick her, but this wasn’t about me. I caressed her outer folds with my fingers, then slid one finger up to her clit and drew small circles. She was so slick my finger glided easily over her small nub. She moaned, then tensed. “I love your moans. Don’t hold them back. Just relax and let me make you come.”

  She did, and as my finger circled her clit faster, her moans and gasps came faster as well. She was close. I quickly sucked one nipple into my mouth and gave her clit a flick with my thumb and she arched her back, her muscles trembling as she came under my hand. I lavished her breast, and my finger on her clit slowed to a soft caress. She would be over sensitive right now, so I had to start my licking very slowly to bring her toward her second orgasm. “Now I’m going to lick you,” I warned her.

  She watched me through hooded eyes as I lay down between her legs, spreading her wider. Her pussy was glistening and I pressed a kiss to her folds as I would with her pink mouth. Soft and slow, my tongue slid out and along her slick folds, then I trapped one between my lips to suckle lightly and I was rewarded with a soft moan from Amber. Nothing was more satisfying for me than knowing I was giving Amber pleasure with my mouth. I wasn’t vain but I knew I was good at licking. That was the one good thing about being a man-whore. I kissed her folds, then her clit. She gasped. I parted my lips and nudged her with the tip of my tongue. “Zach.” Her voice was breathless. I reached down and grasped my cock under the towel, and started stroking myself as I circled her nub with my tongue very slowly. “Hmm,” I hummed and Amber got wetter. I took her clit into my mouth and gently sucked on it, while flicking my tongue over it, then slowly around it. She put her hand on my head, raking her fingers through my hair. I didn’t think she realized it and that was the best thing. I couldn’t help a satisfied grin as she nudged her pelvis up again in encouragement. She was so wet. I knew my finger would have slid in easily, and maybe even my cock. God, how I wanted to feel her juices around my cock right now. Instead I circled her opening with the tip of my tongue, before dipping it inside. Amber gasped, and I waited to see if she felt uncomfortable, but her legs opened a bit wider to give me better access. Satisfaction swelled in my chest. I slowly slid my tongue in and out of her opening and stroked her clit with my thumb as I rubbed myself in rhythm with my tongue’s thrusts. Amber was close. She squirmed and gasped and whimpered. I quickly cupped my mouth over her folds and clit, and sucked. She cried out and shook under me. Closing my eyes, I relished in the feel of her pussy. I squeezed my cock hard, pressing my lips together as I came on my leg. I rested my cheek on her inner thigh for a few more moments, relishing in the feel of her heated skin. Eventually I sat up and cleaned myself with the towel before lying down beside Amber. She snuggled up to me. “I think we’ll need another shower,” I said teasingly. She laughed. Her laughs, her moans, her smiles – so many things I couldn’t get enough of.

  CHAPTER FIFTEEN

  Amber

  When Zach and I stepped into the kitchen, Brian sat at the table with his laptop. Pumpkin perched on the windowsill, giving me the cold shoulder. He was probably annoyed that he always had to sleep alone in my room because I spent the nights with Zach.

  “I fed Pumpkin. I wasn’t sure if you’d ever emerge from Zach’s room.” Brian scanned my face and I couldn’t meet his gaze after what Zach had done to me this morning. My skin still tingled. Had Brian heard something? Did he know? This was too embarrassing. I hid my face behind the fridge door but when I emerged with a yogurt, Brian was still glancing between Zach and me. “Are you going home for Thanksgiving?”

  Was that why he’d been staring? I hadn’t even thought about Thanksgiving, but Brian was right; it was only two weeks away. “Of course,” I said. I couldn’t believe that I hadn’t seen Dad in so long. Brian’s eyes darted to Zach, who was busy spreading Nutella on a slice of bread. “I’ll call Dad.”

  Brian nodded. “I need to leave or I’ll be late for my lunch date with Lauren.”

  Zach made a face behind Brian’s back. I managed to keep my face neutral, but when Brian had left the kitchen, I jabbed a finger against Zach’s chest. “You’re impossible.” Zach took a bite of his Nutella bread and shrugged. I wrapped my arms around his wa
ist and he lightly stroked my back. “Do you celebrate Thanksgiving with your parents?”

  He snorted. “They celebrate Thanksgiving at their country club. They don’t expect me to come.”

  “So what do you usually do?”

  “In the last few years I went out partying with the guys.”

  “Oh, of course,” I said. “Do you want to go partying this year too?”

  “I’d rather spend the day in bed with you.” He kissed my throat, sending small fireworks down my spine.

  “Why don’t you come home with me and Brian, and celebrate with my family? I’d love to officially introduce you to my father as my boyfriend.” Or was that too fast for Zach? When did people usually introduce their boyfriend to their parents? I really wished Mom was still there to meet Zach as well.

  “I’ve met your father before,” Zach joked, then he sobered. He actually looked hesitant. “Are you sure?

  “I am. I really want you to come.”

  “Okay,” he said slowly. “But won’t your dad mind?”

  “I think he’ll be happy for me.”

  “I wouldn’t be so sure about that. Look at Brian. I don’t see happy when I look at his face.”

  “Brian is happy for me, for us.”

  Zach looked doubtful, but he nodded. “Family Thanksgiving it is, then.”

  I grinned. “I’ll call my dad and tell him.” I pressed a quick kiss against Zach’s lips before I hurried into my room and grabbed my phone. As always when I called Dad answered on the second ring. “Amber?” And as usual worry swung in his voice. I hated that his first reaction to a call from me was concern that something might have happened.